An Inevitable Conclusion

As much as I would love to be a highly successful tarot reader in a face-to-face professional environment (it’s where I do my best work and offer the most value), I’ve come to realize that my true calling is undoubtedly as a writer. In all modesty, I haven’t come across much modern writing on cartomantic subjects that I would be proud to call my own; although most of it that merits commercial publication is competent enough, it doesn’t leave a lasting impression to the point that I will ever revisit it for inspiration. (Think of the old Miller Lite slogan as a lament: “Tastes great! Less filling” where “more filling” is the desired outcome.) If he were to be asked, Mel Brooks, in his trademark Brooklyn accent, would most likely dismiss the lot as “the soitch for more money.” (The Book of Thoth is a notable exception with few equals; Yoav Ben-Dov’s The Open Reading, Joseph Maxwell’s The Tarot and Andy Boroveshengra’s Lenormand – 36 Cards are others I keep close at hand.) During my 30+ years as a professional technical and legal writer, I was compelled to develop an economy of style and expression that has served me well here. It was by nature bone-dry work, so I’ve tried to juice up my divination essays with a little quirky storytelling panache, although I admit to still favoring deep metaphysical analysis (once an engineer, always an engineer, I guess). I have a Mensan’s ferocious appetite for mental pursuits, and in my case it leans toward esoteric matters.

Outside of the few on-line conversations I’ve had with followers, it’s hard to tell how this blog has been received. I watch the stat trends closely and it looks like a roller-coaster ride, with banner days of well over 100 views and slumps of less than twenty. What tickles me is that I have such a widespread (although thinly-seeded) international following, often in places I wouldn’t expect to have much of a tarot presence. But at the risk of alienating my touchier readers, I admit that I don’t feel the need to pump up my stats by pandering to anyone’s “sacred cows.” I write mainly for my own satisfaction, and offering my observations to the world is an unpaid (actually, self-funded) side-project. In other words, I’m paying for the privilege of writing this blog: if you like what I write, fine; if you don’t like what I write, also fine. Don’t let the door hit you in the backside.

I’m reminded of the song “Garden Party” by Rick Nelson, in which he sang:

“But it’s all right now, I learned my lesson well
You see, ya can’t please everyone, so ya got to please yourself”

Nelson knew what it meant to be marginalized by the passing of time, a mere footnote in history. He became a name without a face, a past without a future, condemned to repeat himself ad nauseam at “oldies” shows.

I sometimes ponder why I bother to engage in the practice of divination. The pat answer is “to help others,” but in truth I read for other people only occasionally. The real reason is more to please myself, but not, as might be supposed, by reading about my own situations and circumstances. It’s the outlet for creative self-expression, the satisfaction that comes with mastering the skills to convey insights about the future with sensitivity and precision that motivate me. I’m typically looking for the cutting edge in any subject I approach, but I fear I sometimes find myself on the “lunatic fringe” instead. At least it’s comforting to know that I have a long way to go before I arrive at the erudite and eccentric inscrutability (some would say opacity) of an Aleister Crowley. Not that I aspire to it, since failure to measure up is most assuredly a foregone conclusion.

Anyway, back to business. I’ve scaled back my daily posts to some degree in recent weeks, mainly due to lack of fresh insights and a desire not to repeat myself. I’ve covered most of the important topics at least once, and sometimes twice or more from different angles. I will finish my current Tarot de Marseille “pips” exploration and then see where it goes from there since my WordPress subscription renewal is coming up at the end of the month. My post count since July of 2017 stands at 833 as I write this (and it will definitely be higher by the time you read it). I would encourage anyone who hasn’t done so to poke around in my back-catalog of posts; you’re sure to find something that piques your interest. Use the more reliable Select Category drop-down and not the word-search function, which fails to find everything it should. Eventually there could be a self-published book of tarot spreads or possibly an app on the horizon.

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