The “Needs Fulfillment” Relationship Spread

I don’t know how this one escaped my initial push to post all of my spreads here. I created it back in 2016, but it has since been eclipsed by shorter, simpler spreads. Still, in going back over the guidance text, I find that it has value in more complicated situations, not all of which are romantic in nature. Note that I designed this spread before I realized the utility of the “quintessence” card, which could be used to derive the cards in Column C and the “roll-up” cards in positions 11 and 12. Rather than redesigning it, I will leave the choice up to you.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/v9cfrllmdr36nf3/Relationship%20Spread.pdf?raw=1

10 thoughts on “The “Needs Fulfillment” Relationship Spread

  1. So, I did this spread on a possible relationship following a couple of dates. Used Robinwood deck.

    Card 1 = knight of cups- self explanatory as this is a love relationship.

    Card 2,5,8 my column are 8 cups,(emotional needs) 2 wands reversed (intellectual needs) and 5 cups (physical needs) this suggests that I am a bit apathetic and watery about it. I’m probably not going to get my intellectual needs fully met, but the relationship will help me move on emotionally and physically. My round up card 11 is page of wands meaning that I am looking at this as an adventure but still fairly neutral.
    His column cards 3,6 and 9 show he is in awareness and comfortable of his emotional needs (queen of swords) his intellectual needs is 4 wands reversed suggests he is fairly happy and content with getting these met by the relationship and the physical needs card is temperance meaning he has some flexibility and is pretty balanced in his approach. His roll up card 12 is 8 pentacles meaning he will probably work quite diligently with the relationship

    Card 13 is 10 cups, happy families – a good card so shows positive overall. However the card sin column C aren’t quite so good – card 4,7,10 are 10 wands, fool reversed and death. Looking deeper into the horizontals shows me that emotionally my 8 cups with his queen swords gives us 10 wands my water with the fire from wands May mean that emotionally It will fizzle out, his queen of swords may override it.

    Intellectually my 2 wands reversed with his 4 wands reversed gives us fool reversed. Fool is an air card. Fire and air are pretty well dignified but the reversals may indicate problems or just the fact we haven’t explored this enough so there is still “blocked” energy here.

    Physically it’s interesting. I’m going in looking at the past and crying over what was lost in a previous relationship (5 cups) and he is offering a major big trump card, and it’s Venus so he may be a loving and alchemistic lover. Death as the joint card is interesting either signifying new beginnings or the end! Tempered by 10 cups as the roll up card though I tend to veer towards new beginnings.

    Card 16 which is advice is King of swords – strong and formidable relationship if he (emperor card 15) rules the roost and I (page cups reversed card 14) am more amenable. In some decks page cups reversed shows adultery so this may point to me being amenable to him “playing around” – errr no!

    The final card is ace of wands – which in Robinwood looks like a giant phallus. This relationship may just be about the sex!

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  2. Interesting spread. I pay more attention to the horizontal triplets than to the individual columns: the cards in the “A” and “B” columns show what each party brings to the table in the way of needs and the cards in Column C suggest how they will work out their differences (with ease, with difficulty or not at all).

    In the “Emotional Needs” row, you bring resignation and disillusionment from the past while he has his feelings well in hand but may exhibit an opinionated self-control that borders on the annoying. The “Appreciation”” card (10 of Wands) indicates that coming up to speed with his unshakable sense of certainty may be a challenge for you.

    In the “Intellectual Needs” row, the reversed Wands show that expectations aren’t high on either side. The 2 of Wands I consider a card of indecision and hesitation, with one foot in each of two worlds and still mulling over the next step; the reversal pushes it.even further into the “gray area.” With the 4 of Wands, he wants a celebratory atmosphere but the reversal may mean that he is willing to make some concessions to your uncertainty. I see Wands as more about “good times” than deep thinking, so profound conversations probably aren’t on the agenda. The “Stimulation” card (Fool reversed) suggests that the relationship could lose its way if things get too cerebral.

    In the “Physical Needs” row, the 5 of Cups is carrying “baggage” that can be hard to leave behind. I call it the “take the best and leave the rest” card, but that can be very hard to do. I consider Temperance to be a card of finesse and “the fine Art of Right Action;” with Death in the middle, the angel could be bringing you a transformative epiphany of some kind, maybe “wake up and smell the roses” In physical terms, it suggests satisfaction, since the number of Temperance (14) reduces numerologically to 5, a number that has been linked to the senses. If you can let go of the past, you may have a pleasant revelation ahead.

    Your “Profile” card (the Page of Wands) I see as something of a “player,” always ready to “go with the flow.” His “Profile” card (the 8 of Pentacles) is sober and diligent; Fire and Earth are not elementally unfriendly, so a good-natured ambience could result as long as you don’t get too impatient with him and he doesn’t become exasperated with your impulsiveness.With the 10 of Cups as the “Fulfillment Opportunity” card, maybe you will set up house together.

    The two “Reaction” cards (yours the Page of Cups and his the Emperor) looks like a “father/daughter” kind of arrangement, and the King of Swords as the “Adjustment and Advice” card implies that all of the accommodating will be on your side since he’s sure he’s right. But the Ace of Wands as the “Yes or No” card is saying just do it for as long as it lasts, don’t think too much about it.

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    • That’s very accurate. He is very self assured and certain that we can have a great relationship. I’m more reticent and certainly a lot more cautious hence coming up to speed is tricky!

      Good advice on the intellectual. I’m more academic and geeky than him! I doubt we’d do crosswords together or discuss philosophy which is what I would like, but I have friends who can do this.

      I see this date as a getting over a past relationship so that could explain my cards. It would be lovely to be “transformed” and let go of my past. I’d be willing to do it.

      I’m not really a “player” but I do go with the flow. I’m very laid back and easy going but I go into relationships with a view to the long term and don’t go into them easily- maybe shown by 2 wands reversed too? I was wondering if fire and earth were dignified or not. Not too sure if they would produce a “smog” but I felt it was tempered a bit by the 10 cups in the middle ?

      Totally agree with the read on the “reaction” cards. He has to “rule the roost” I’m ok with that as I’m so easy going.

      Great to see the Ace there too. I very much overanalyse and have been a bit hurt in my last relationship. He is super keen and assuredly optimistic. An accurate read – thanks. Next time I use the spread my emphasis will be in the horizontals. I did want to ask about the quint. Would I do a quint for the whole spread or each column or each vertical?

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      • The way I do it, I would create several sub-quints that then produce a Grand Quint. Instead of dealing the Column C cards 4, 7, 10, 13 and 16 from the deck, make sub-quints from the Column A and B cards in the same rows. Then add up the sub-quints to make a Grand Quint at Card 17. I had thought about doing sub-quints for the roll-up cards 11, 12 and 13 from the cards above them, but that would orphan cards 14 and 15 so I believe it’s best not to until I ponder it some more. It would be interesting to see how this compares to just adding up cards 1 through 17 as dealt to get the overall quint, but I like the idea of making Column C a numerical blending. I’m going to try it both ways and see what it looks like. Note that I would drop cards 1 and 17 from the equation when doing it this way, since Card #1 is like a “stage-setter” and Card #17 is replaced by the Grand Quint.

        I do quints a little differently: I subtract reversed card values since that’s the only way you can arrive at the Fool as zero; otherwise you have to renumber it as 22, which I don’t want to do. Similarly, it can yield a reversed quint card, which I like as well. Also, I assign numbers 11, 12, 13 and 14 to the court cards since I think the quint should be a composite of all the cards in the population and see no reason to exclude some simply because there are no numbers on their faces.

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  3. OK, for the Grand Quint using the sub-quint approach I described, I get the Wheel of Fortune. Note that I had the Sun come up twice in Column C so I had to use a second deck (the Old English Tarot) to populate it. Column C had the World, the Lovers reversed (which I think echoes the main reading), the Sun, the Sun, the Chariot reversed (perhaps reflecting that he feels constrained by you “putting the brakes on”) and the Wheel of Fortune as roll-up. With the Ace of Wands (also a Fire card) as its counterpart (10=1+0=1), maybe you should take a chance on him after all. Doing the quint to original way (but using my special rules), I get the Empress, suggesting that you would have more control over him than you might think with the meek Page of Cups rx as your “reaction” card. I reminds me of the old TV commercial that went “It’s not nice to fool Mother Nature!”

    Anyway, the quint cards show a more encouraging outlook. Good luck.

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  4. I missed your question about the 10 of Cups between the Page of Wands and the 8 of Pentacles. If the two of you are able to moderate your stances a bit (easy-going vs. meticulous), the 10 of Cups looks like a chance to forge a happy connection. The sub-quint of these is the Sun, another numerological counterpart (19=1+9=10), which I think reinforces that impression.

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  5. Thank you. I agree about subtracting reversed cards. The Quints are encouraging. It’s interesting that Empress turned up. I think that speaks of my “control” only through being female, it would be the only control I would have as he is a traditional “bloke” type of guy. Thanks for explaining x

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