I did a reading for a woman yesterday who was wondering about the advisability of trying to reconnect with a former friend. The friendship failed under unhappy circumstances almost six months ago and they hadn’t seen each other until a chance meeting at a local supermarket, a cordial but very brief encounter that opened no doors to reconciliation. She gave me permission to post my analysis here. I used my “Water Under the Bridge” relationship dynamics spread and the Thoth deck, with reversals.
Person #1, the querent, is Gemini and Person #2 is Virgo (which should tell you something about the mercurial “surface” of the relationship right there); I chose the Queen of Swords as the Significator for the querent and the Queen of Disks for the second party based on known personality traits rather than strictly on astrological correspondences. Note that Air and Earth are elementally unsympathetic to begin with.
The positions were as follows:
Cards #1 & #2, Querent’s Strengths and Weaknesses: Ace of Swords reversed and 9 of Wands, “Strength”
Cards #3 & #4, Second Party’s Strengths and Weaknesses: 3 of Swords, “Sorrow” and Star
Card #5, What the Querent Offers: 8 of Disks reversed, “Prudence”
Card #6, What the Second Party Offers: Queen of Wands
Card #7, How It Begins: 10 of Cups, “Satiety”
Card #8, Querent’s Compromise: 7 of Wands reversed, “Valour”
Card #9, Second Party’s Compromise: 8 of Wands, “Swiftness”
Card #10, How It Ends: 5 of Disks reversed, “Worry”
Right off the top, it’s apparent that the querent is coming from a position of greater strength than the other person, who has isolated herself (Star) by her regrettable behavior and attitude (3 of Swords). In the first case, Air and Fire are elementally compatible, while in the second case Earth and Air are incompatible. The querent is comfortable with the validity of her decision (9 of Wands) but continues to pick at it in a characteristically nervous Geminian fashion (Ace of Swords reversed). The chance meeting piqued her interest in a slightly uncomfortable way (Ace reversed), hence her desire for a reading.
The 8 of Disks reversed as what the querent can offer to the other person is a very meaningful card in this reading since it corresponds to the Sun in Virgo, the second party’s Sun sign. The “shoulder to cry on” scenario looks like it could experience a reprise, to no good effect. The querent’s forbearance would be tested anew.
The Queen of Wands as what the second party can offer looks like a blithe dismissal that anything unfortunate occurred between them. This Queen likes things on her own terms, so the other person would try to pick up the thread of the relationship again as if nothing did. As a former high-profile entrepreneur, this person has the instincts of an attack dog, so she would very likely move right in on the opportunity. She prefers to run her friendships like a business, but only from the “boss’s perspective.”
The 10 of Cups at the beginning of an attempted reconciliation shows that the querent is prepared to put the best possible face on it. She would like to be on easy terms again with the other woman but isn’t going to expose herself emotionally to the same distress that originally drove her away. (The significance of “Satiety” is that she’s “had enough” of that.) The other person is at the same point of desired rapprochement, so things would commence on pleasant terms but with little emotional investment on either side.
The 7 of Wands reversed as “the Querent’s compromise” shows that she would have to back down a bit from the moral high ground she took when the friendship fell apart. This coupled with the reversed 8 of Disks suggests that this may be too bitter a pill for her to swallow.
The 8 of Wands as “the second party’s compromise” shows that she would probably be moving too fast for anything to faze her much. This card echoes the “teflon” quality of untarnished optimism that the Queen of Wands exemplifies. Her enthusiasm might be high but her self-interest would brook no “meeting half-way.” It doesn’t look to me like she would be prepared to give an inch if she had the chance to get her foot back in the door.
The 5 of Disks reversed at the end reflects that there is little likelihood for the friendship to climb out of the doldrums and take on new life. There is still too much doubt afoot in the situation to give it even a fair chance of success. The four reversed cards neatly summarize the querent’s stake in the matter, while the two Wands and the Star on the second party’s side show that she still doesn’t have a clue what brought the friendship down in the first place. Clearly, the time isn’t right for overtures of renewed contact, and it may never be.