A Fundamentalist Sex-Education Fable

I think even the Shakers would have caught the satirical drift of this one! Maybe the Tea Party would endorse teaching it in Sunday School.

“In the beginning were the primordial “dot” [ . ] and the “cipher” [ 0 ]. Excitation of these principals soon begat the “exclamatory” [ ! ] and the “parenthetical divide”         [ ( ) ]. The union of this pair [ (!) ], accompanied by considerable heat and friction, produced the “comma,” in great abundance ( , , , , , , , ).

There followed an interlude of slackening, during which the “exclamatory” [ ! ] slowly wilted, giving way to the “interrogatory” [ ? ], and the “parenthetical divide” gradually drew in [ || ], presaging a return to the primordial state [ . ] and [ 0 ] . . .”

. . . often followed by coffee, cigarettes and conversation. But that’s another fable.

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